Episode 463: Confessions of My “Bad” Money Habits & What Actually Matters for Financial Freedom

Jamila Souffrant 0:02

Making these kind of errors in those earlier stages are more costly because the margin for error is smaller, the extra 2030, $40 that may be oozing out because you're not making the list or because you're not checking the mail and miss that check or that bill that matters, because a mistake can then put you further back than you need to be

Jamila Souffrant 0:29

welcome to the journey. To launch podcast with your host Jamila Souffrant as a money expert who wants her talk she helps brave journeyers like you get out of debt, save, invest and build real wealth. Join her on the journey to launch to financial freedom in 54321,

Jamila Souffrant 0:56

if you want the episode show notes for this episode, go to journey to launch.com or click the description of wherever you're listening to this episode in the show notes, you'll get the transcribed version of the conversation, the links that we mentioned and so much more. Also, whether you are an OG journeyer or brand new to the podcast, I've created a free jumpstart guide to help you on your financial freedom journey. It includes the top episodes to listen to, stages to go through to reach financial freedom resources and so much more you can go to journey to launch.com/jumpstart

Jamila Souffrant 1:32

to get your guide right now. Okay, let's hop into the episode.

Jamila Souffrant 1:38

Hey, hey, hey, journeyers, welcome to the journey to launch podcast. I am grateful that you're listening to this, especially if you're listening to this in real time. What the episode is released. I'm releasing this the last week of January 2026

Jamila Souffrant 1:54

as always, I like to make sure my episodes are timeless. So no matter when you're listening to this, maybe you'll be listening to this in 2032

Jamila Souffrant 2:02

and this is helpful to you, but that's my goal. I do want to address certain current events and things that are happening right now. It's, it's interesting how different people deal with all the things happening in the world, in terms of, I would say, the bad, there's, there's so much bad, I say, so much conflict, so much trauma in the world. And sometimes that trauma or those things are really close to you, meaning in your neighborhood, in your family. Sometimes they feel a little bit disconnected. Maybe it's not immediately something you see every day, but or you, or affects you directly. But you see it on the news, you see it on social media, or maybe if you're Empath or someone who really does hold things, and if you see something, you put yourself in that situation, it gets to you. And I just want to hold space for that, because there is a lot going on, especially with the recent events with ice and what's going on in Minnesota, which is just one of many places in the United States where this is happening, where people are not even being treated like people. And whatever side you know, I know, I have a large audience in terms of, I think, discernment and thinkers, and so I might have people who are kind of on the spectrum of thought on what should be and why things are happening the way they are. But I do think, I believe that everyone, ultimately, especially if you're listening to the show, has a want for not only their own family security, because I talk about money and financial security a lot, but want to us all to live in a good world, or at least a world where we feel safe. And especially if you're raising kids, you want them to inherit a world that

Jamila Souffrant 3:57

is safer. And sometimes looking at the world now, it just doesn't seem like it's that way. So I just want to hold space for that. And sometimes I may not publicly talk about or say certain things, and maybe I'll talk a little bit about personalities and money in a bit. That's what this episode is about, and it bleeds into everything I do. I just want you to know that if you're like me, and you're someone who needs to detach, not because you don't care, or maybe you're not the kind of activist that is, you know, flying out and on front lines, protesting, and there are other ways that you are dealing with and figuring things out, or holding space because you need to be strong for your immediate family that I am here for you. We all are handling this experience of the world, of living this life, this one life we have, depending on what religion you believe in. But if this one, if this is our one life, our experiences and everything that makes us who we are and how we view.

Jamila Souffrant 5:00

Things impact greatly, just what we do, and everyone handles things differently. And so I just thought like I've been kind of scrolling, looking, seeing and feeling a lot, and I just want to hold space for that and acknowledge that and

Jamila Souffrant 5:18

know that I am I'm with you, and one of the things, or I would say, a resource, that I really learn from and listen to a lot is the daily the podcast called the daily, and every day they have an episode and usually talks about current events. And I learned so much from it in terms of different things happening in the world, they focus a lot, or they have been focusing a lot on, just like current issues. So that includes things that are happening with ice and in Minnesota and Trump. I mean, obviously, and so I want to say, from a perspective of someone who likes to listen and learn and figure out my part in things that it's been helpful, just one of the many resources that helps me learn and understand and process along with other things. So I just felt like I It would be nice to hopefully share that resource with you. In case you did not know about the daily podcast, but it's something I really enjoy learning from. Okay with that, I want to talk about money. You know, let's go back to money. We're talking about money because it is a privilege, one I always say this, the fact that we, for most of us, can think about financial freedom and money in this way is a privilege. Because there's so many people around the world who don't, don't this is not an option to think about extra money, to do extra things and to retire early. And there's so many people who don't have stability and money truly is a form and knowing how to handle money and get ahead and not be on the hamster wheel and use money as a tool for reclaiming power, or to at least have a say in your personal agency. What happens around you is key, and it's not something I take lightly in terms of of the privilege I feel that I have in my situation, and that perspective helps me a lot when I think about or when I think, Oh, if I want to be negative about something, I just think how grateful I am to be where I am and to have the things that I have, even if it may not be all the things I desire, it's it's more than enough when it comes to my experience in this life. And so thinking about that, and thinking about how far I've come since starting my journey to financial freedom and talking about money and being a money educator, I wanted to just peel back the curtains a bit on just my own money mishaps or mistakes, my bad quote, unquote money habits. Because I want to show that while you can make progress with your money, you don't have to be perfect with your money. I'm not perfect with everything that I do with money. I don't do all the right things. I make a lot of mistakes. I've made a lot of mistakes, but none of that defines my value or

Jamila Souffrant 8:21

prevents me from ultimately being okay financially. And I want you to feel that too for yourself, if you have shame around maybe some of your money habits or the mistakes you're making. So I'm going to just share some with you the bad money habits, quote, unquote, that I have, that I have done and still do, honestly, and then just to kind of bring, bring it home a bit. So okay, here's my bad money habits. I do not shop with the list when I go shopping in terms of the grocery store. Now, I might sometimes have a general list, but that list where I should be sitting down before I leave and writing everything out so I don't over buy something like, I come home and I literally, it's like, I have three of these already, and you keep forgetting that you have one, because you don't check, you don't write a list. So that's me. I don't shop with a list for the most part when I go to the grocery store. Also kind of with that is that my, I wouldn't say my, my main, like, grocery store that I like shopping at is Trader Joe's. Gasp, I saw someone say, like, if you're shopping at Trader Joe's for your main groceries, like, what's wrong with you? Because you can save so much more by bulk shopping and and shopping for more deals. Because Trader Joe's generally, they just their price is their price, but I really enjoy a lot of the Trader Joe's products, and I just like knowing what I get from there and the consistency of it all. So I do still bulk shop at places like BJs and Costco, but I definitely like to do most of my shopping at Trader Joe's for the i.

Jamila Souffrant 10:00

Items that I like and my kids like. So that's not necessarily a bad money habit. It's just not for some people, it's just not economical. Again, these are first world problems, by the way. Now the other bad money habit I have is I don't budget every dollar. I don't budget every dollar as much as I did in the beginning and for a while, especially last year. The last couple years, I was not even budgeting consistently. Now I do budget, especially this year, I made it one of my goals to be more on top of my budget, but in terms of every dollar, I have a lot of room in my budget for mistakes and unexpected expenses, because they just happen a lot in our household, where things just come up and I make room for it, and so I don't budget every dollar because it feels impossible with the current state of our finances and where we are and with our life and our kids and the things we like doing. The other thing I don't do well, or what I consider a not so great bad money habit is I forget to use coupons or check an app or the app of a store that I'm in to save money. Now, when I remember and I do it, so if I am shopping at the grocery store or like somewhere, like a BJs, and I remember, I've been doing that more recently, I'll check it. I'll make sure I load all my coupons. But for such a long time, I was not doing that, and when I started doing that recently, I was like, Look how much like I saved $30

Jamila Souffrant 11:32

just by clicking a button. And so it's something that I don't always do still, because a lot of things I do sometimes are last minute, but I don't always use coupons. I forget to check the app for coupons, and kind of miss out on some savings there. Here's one that I really need to get better at, but I just I'm not doing really well, is I don't open my mail right away. I don't I just my mail typically can pile up a little bit, and when that happens, I am ashamed. I am ashamed. I can admit my shame here. I'm ashamed to admit that I've missed out on cashing a couple checks because the date in which they needed to be cashed, because that they were delivered just wasn't in time. That definitely feels like a fail for me, because I'm just like, really, like, open your mail girl. And ultimately, the mail does get opened, but it's one of what I would say is something that I don't necessarily do well all the time, and I can make a lot of excuses for that with life and being overwhelmed with all the things that I have to do on a day to day basis. But yes, not opening the mail and missing some kind of checks have been something that's happened in the past. The other thing, which I wouldn't say it's necessarily a bad money habit, but it's a habit, or money habit that people may be surprised that is, I don't check my investment accounts often. I'm not someone who logs in consistently to see how the money is doing. I'm on the border of saying I don't care. I do care. Obviously, it's money. It's a lot of money we've been investing and saving for a long time. But I just don't care what happens in the short term, especially when there are market drops or things happening where the value of the accounts go down and even when the value of the accounts go up, I'm just not that impressed or pressed to see the numbers, because I know that there's a I know it's there. So one, they are in safely held accounts all reputable places and institutions. So I know it's not going to disappear. And so with that and my security, and knowing that I'm just not as I'm not checking it every day, I'm not obsessed with how those accounts move, because I'm in for the long term. Maybe if I was retiring soon and needed that money sooner, I would be more on it in terms of checking it often. But because I'm I'm not, I don't need it anytime soon. I'm happy to let it sit and accumulate. And of course, I do check in. So this is one of the things I do for the assessment. When, if you've taken any of my courses, or heard when I give tips about what to do is assessing how much you actually have, because in order to create a financial independence plan, you need to know that. And so I do go in top of the year I did that, I've actually now I use Y and a B. You need a budget to budget on my phone and on the computer. But now I have also, I was doing a cash flow budget where it was bringing in my accounts, like credit card and account information, but now I've actually added in my investment account, so I can kind of just get a look at net worth more often. But it's not again, something I check often.

Jamila Souffrant 14:42

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So go pick up your journey to financial freedom.com. So I can show you how to map out how to get from where you are today to where you ultimately want to be. And enjoy the journey while you're on the path, head over to your journey to financial freedom.com. To see where you can pick the book up. It's available on Amazon, bookshop.org, Barnes and Noble, your local bookstore everywhere go to your journey to financial freedom.com to get the book now. And I think the last thing I would say that just sums up everything of my bad or not so great, money habits or not conventional for someone who is a financial educator, is that I'm not on top of everything. I don't have everything covered. Everything in my financial life is not crossed off and dotted to an I and crossed to a T. It's just not the way I think and like to operate in the stage that I'm in. Now, if you are listening to this, and you're like, wait, I do some of this too. See, you're not alone, and all those things I just mentioned, despite those things in my current state, I still feel very financially secure and free with my money. And there are a couple reasons for this, so I want to talk about like, why this happens, maybe for me, and maybe you can see some patterns in yourself, and then also just this whole myth of perfection and what we need to do and how we can move through imperfection on our journey. So I'll speak for myself. But if you resonate with this, you know, definitely let me know. But I've always been a big picture thinker. I like big things and planning big things, so part of it is my personality and the way I think my brain is wired. But when I say big picture, I like thinking about, Okay, do I have the big financial plan set? Do I have the idea of when I think I can retire early, or when the mortgage will be paid off? And even for my life, even personally, family planning? It's funny when I tell people this, they're like, You are a planner, because you were able to plan this with God's help, obviously. But when I think about my children, I wanted to have three kids, two years apart, born in certain months, and my three kids were born in the order that I preferred, two boys and then a girl in the months that I preferred, May and June. My husband and I are both winter babies, January and February birthdays, and I knew for sure I did not want to have kids with birthdays in those months. So we want, I wanted to spring, beginning of summer, babies with their birthdays in warmer weather, because it just, I just know the pain of being a February birthday growing up in New York, and wanted something different for them, and I also wanted them to be two years apart, and that's basically what happened with my kids. Planned it so that they are two years apart, two boys and a girl. Again. Some of this, I can't take credit for everything, because it was all I think, through a higher design and plan. But when I talk about big picture, that's what I think about, like the big picture of family planning, when I got married, when we had kids, when we bought the house, like those things, those big things matter, and then all the other things we'll figure out. Planning does excite me when it's big picture, but then when it becomes smaller, like micromanagement, it drains me. It overwhelms me, even when I the list thing, not creating lists, going to the grocery store, when I think about it, it actually gives me more I don't know if anxiety is the right word, but it makes me not want to go to the grocery store if I have to sit down and do another step before going. Now, when I ever I have made a list, it does make things easier. So I do acknowledge that it's helpful, but it's just knowing me, I tend to get overwhelmed really easily by smaller task and things. Now I have not been officially diagnosed with ADHD, and I probably should go get checked. Maybe it will just do. Explain a lot of things, but I do have a way I think of thinking, or non linear way of thinking and getting overwhelmed, easy and distracted easy that makes me feel that it's very similar to the way that I've been handling like money and finances. Now it's not a lack of care, because I do care. I care that we are financially stable. I do care that a check comes in the mail and I'm able to cash it, but it's just the way my brain currently works. I respect money, but it's not something I obsess over. And I'll talk a little bit more about my view of money and how I think this helps me when I am talking about money, or how I've handled it, but I'm not as obsessive over the small things, because money is just not something that I don't want to have it rule what I do, even though I know how important it is, obviously, because I built kind of, like the second half of my career, like after I left corporate America talking about money. So I do know it's important now this is where I want to say that the stage of the journey that you're in matters a lot when it comes to being able to make mistakes or to have some of these bad habits. I talk about the five journey or stages. It's the stages that you flow through and go through to reach financial independence, and the earlier stages where you are just getting to stability, where you maybe, maybe you don't have any money left over to save or invest. You just want to get to where you can pay your bills. Or maybe you're in the debt payoff mode, or maybe you're in the accumulation mode. So the first three stages, that's kind of big summary of what they are. It's getting to stability. Stage one. Stage two is getting out of consumer debt, and stage three is accumulating assets, and so making these kind of errors that even though errors that I'm talking about are that I make in those earlier stages are more costly because the margin for error is smaller, because if you need to get out of debt, or just need to get to a place of stability, the extra 2030, $40 $100 that may be oozing out because you're not making the list or because you're not checking the mail and missed that check for that bill that matters, because a mistake can then put you further back than You need to be, versus someone who's further ahead on the journey. So that's the latter two stages, what I call work flexibility, where you reach the stage where you can choose what you do for work, or you've reached complete financial independence, you more than likely have more room. There's more of a margin to make mistakes. Or where 100 or $200

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doesn't like that error, that mistake, doesn't mean as much as if you were in the beginning. So the stage that you are in the journey, I do believe, matters when it comes to your mistakes. So if you do feel like you have some of those mistakes or those bad money habits that I mentioned, but you are earlier in the journey, it may feel more pressure and you may feel a little bit more shame around that just because when you do make those mistakes, you feel it more. But it still does not define who you are or dictate that you can't get out of the journey or stages to move ahead. It's just understanding where you are and adjusting as necessary. So for me, even though right now, those are the things I'm kind of doing still, in terms of bad money habits, when I first started my journey, I was budgeting every dollar because I wanted to get out of my job. I wanted to pay off any debt that we had. I was really, really intense in making progress, and so I know I couldn't. I couldn't sustain mistakes that those money habits would bring, for example, when I remember where I was thinking about this the other day. Remember when I was going to work in the beginning, before I found financial independence and I would my highlight of my day was thinking about where I was going to go for lunch. I used to love thinking about going out to eat for lunch. And I was a loner, so I used to go by myself. That was like the best part of my day I get to leave the office. I was working in Jersey, so I felt like Jersey had so many more cooler options of where to eat, like fast food, and that would be the highlight. And I would go every day to get something to eat, spending 10 to $15 a day. Now, when I found out about financial independence, and the goal became to invest aggressively, as much as I could, and to save money so that I can quit my job, I switched. And I was so much more intense about meal prepping, eating breakfast at home and not going out to eat, and so I switched when I realized my goals and how important they were to me, and if I were in an earlier journey or stage or in a situation that was not serving me, I would probably work a bit harder to correct some of these habits. But the flexibility of where I am allows for me currently. To let some of this go, or to be a little bit more forgiving in these money habits that I have. So when your foundation is strong, ultimately you have more leeway to make mistakes. Now, not big, big mistake, not like I can't make a million dollar mistake or $100,000 mistake? I mean, if I did, I'd figure it out. But I'm talking about, for me, the smaller $100 mistakes I can I can withstand, because as you go further along and have a foundation that is strong, perfection is not necessarily required as much anymore. It's a little optional, right? And so that is what we're working towards when we're thinking about you and your financial journey. That's what I'm thinking about kind of consistently, just appreciating where I am, where I can kind of have this leeway now, this flexibility, I do think, is earned. You have to kind of go through the trenches of the journey so that you can reap the benefits of having more leeway in your finances. Another thing so I know we just talked about the stage of the journey matters in terms of these mistakes or bad money habits. Also feel like the mindset that you have also matters with this because again, I value money, I respect money, but I do not worship money. I think money is a tool, but it's not my identity and worth. So because of that, because sometimes I just think all this is so made up. Money is made up. It's ridiculous, like it's a game. And part of me feeling like it's a game helps me detach from the smaller mistakes when they happen, because I'm just like, oh, this is, like, pointless anyway, right? But still keeping the big picture of the stability that I have, I'm able to look at the smaller things like this really does not even matter in the scheme of life. We are all dead and gone. We can't take any of this with us like it does not matter. And so the my detachment from the money and the material things helps a bit in being able to bounce back from my mistakes or things that are not always optimized. So here's the thing I want you to take away this you do not need to be flawless and perfect to be financially okay. You can also make mistakes. Money Management is a skill. It's not a personality trait. It's something you can learn. It can be strengthened when needed and if you need to also ease up because you're using different tools at the moment or focusing on something different. That's fine, too. That's why I feel like it's a muscle that you use, and sometimes you have that muscle memory, and if you need to go back to something so for example, budgeting, it may not have be something that I'm currently doing as strictly as I did in the beginning, but I know it is a tool that I built up in my arsenal that I can bring back out and use again if necessary. And so that gives me the confidence to do things differently or do things my way. And so that is the kind of confidence as you're learning these tools, you might say to yourself, well, Jamila, right now, maybe you're in the beginning stages and you're like, I still don't want to, I don't want to micromanage my money every dollar right now, either I get it. But in order to get through the stages, to get more cushion and flexibility, you have to, you have to teach yourself this skill set so that you can learn it, and you become the person who can do this. So that way, when you get further down the line and you're like, Okay, I have some leeway now. I trust myself. I'm making the big picture decisions that will move me further along or keep me stable. Then you can let go of maybe that habit that you don't want to do anymore, but no, you can pick it up if needed. So think about where you are, maybe what your quote, unquote bad money habits are, or the ones that are not necessarily optimal, and think to yourself, are these things that you can live with? For me, my quote, unquote, bad money habits are things that I can live with, and don't throw us off track too much, right? So think about what are your habits, or things that you feel like you just need to understand and and things that you can live with, or what are things that you know, what you know that is holding you back even more from reaching the goals and going through the stages to get your ultimate place of fulfillment or financial stability. And so maybe you go through it and you're like, you know what? Even though I don't like budgeting and I haven't been budgeting, I know that not having a budget. It's keeping me stuck in this stage, and it might be something you just need to pick up and do, or maybe you made peace with it, and you don't want to budget every dollar, but you're okay with the space and where you're getting to, when your finances and how long it's taking, and so you're okay with that, right? So just think about it and be honest with yourself. Want you to think about. Of not having to be perfect all the time. You can be relaxed but still responsible. You can miss a coupon and still build wealth. And you can also trust yourself as you evolve on this journey. I think trusting yourself is big. It doesn't mean that you don't have have negative thoughts and doubts, because I, you know I do. I still doubt certain things, but I think the core of where I am and what I'm doing, I feel very confident that no matter what, no matter what mistakes are made, that we be okay. That's my ultimate, ultimate takeaway that I have as I was reviewing the notes for this. And what I want you to take away is that your goal doesn't need to be perfection. It just needs to be resilience and knowing that you can figure things out and creating a plan that works for you. Okay, I hope that you enjoyed this episode and that it helps you. If you enjoyed, please at me at journey to launch, or Jamila Souffrant on Instagram, I'm on Twitter and Facebook at journey to launch. Also. Thank you so much for spending the time with me, and I hope this was helpful until next week. Keep on journeying. Journeyers, don't forget, you can get the episode show notes for this episode by going to journey to launch.com or click the description of wherever you're listening to this, and you can still grab your jumpstart guide for free to help you on your journey to financial freedom by going to journey to launch.com/jumpstart

Jamila Souffrant 31:33

if you want to support me and the podcast and love the free content and information that you get here, here are four ways that you can support me in the show. One, make sure you're subscribed to the podcast wherever you listen, whether that's Apple podcasts, that purple app on your phone, your Android device, YouTube, Spotify wherever it is that you happen to listen. Just subscribe so you are not missing an episode. And if you're happening to listen to this in Apple podcasts, rate review and subscribe there. I appreciate and read every single review. Number two, follow me on my social media accounts. I'm at journey to launch on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. And I love, love, love interacting with journeyers. There three, support and check out the sponsors of this show. If you hear something that interests you, sponsors are the main ways we keep the podcast lights on here. So show them some love for supporting your girl four. And last but not least, share this episode, this podcast, with a friend or family member or co worker so that we can spread the message of Journey to launch. All right, that's it until next week. Keep on journeying. Journeyers. You